maarmie's musings

Tuesday, February 08, 2011

Missing mojo

I came on here looking for photos of myself to steal for the dating web sites I recently joined and, instead, found 300-odd spam comments to delete. I swear, you don't come on here in forever and this is what you get! Oh, and when you have an anonymous blog, you're not going to find many photos of yourself, are you? Not really interested in putting the pregnancy/birth photos of myself on a dating site, either. Might scare a few guys off.

Dating web site, you say, maarmie? Are you sure that's wise? I mean, you DID meet your husband on the Internets, and you don't want to go down that road again, do you?


Not looking for marriage, folks, and not really into committed relationships, either. I'm basically looking to make male friends for some fun and/or flirting. This (single) mommy needs to get out of the house more when baby's away. I've been chatting with a few nice fellows for the past week or so. We shall see. We shall see.

Elliot's third birthday comes on Friday. She's at daddy's house for her birthday this year. This makes me very happy as I am not interested in throwing her a birthday party this year. For the last two years, I have hosted parties, and, while it was nice celebrating her birthday with our closest friends here, it was a lot of effort that I don't feel like expending this year.

Since she can't yet read, I guess it's safe to talk about her gifts. This year, I got her a bicycle

complete with basket for the front and sparkly things you attach to the spokes - and a Playmobil family camper as well as a couple of DVDs. Seems pretty over the top as far as birthdays go - especially considering that, for my 10th birthday, my dad got me a 10-speed bicycle and I had to pay for half of it myself! But I tend to spoil her with gifts. Trying to make up for giving her a broken family and all.

I was reading back over old posts today, and I realized how much I miss writing. More frustrating than my lack of a creative outlet is that when I HAVE written lately, I feel like that spark, that thing that made my writing once interesting, has dulled or has been extinguished altogether.

I know writing is something that needs to be constantly practiced or else the shiny edges tarnish. Can I get it back? What is missing from my life that helped feed my talent?

My writing seemed so monochromatic with all my talk of Elliot, Elliot, Elliot. I always feel, lately, like my life is just so uninteresting.

Clever girl

After watching a DVD of PJ Harvey in concert:

Elliot: Mummy, I like PJ Harvey. She's a clever girl!