maarmie's musings

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Dogs do not make good pets for people with guilt complexes and paranoia

I've been having a great time staying in this beautiful house (decorated in a 60s style - groovy!) and taking long walks and playing with Meeko. One thing I can't take, though, is that dog's intense neediness. If she could sit INSIDE me, I know she'd do it. She's on top of me constantly, and, no matter what kind of treat I give her or how much I scratch her belly, she flashes me a pair of sad, brown eyes. My friends insist that she's manipulating me and that I don't have to give her 24 hours of attention every day. They say that I should play with her when I want to and go about my day when I don't. For some reason, I can't do that. I feel like, if I don't include her, I'm abandoning her. Her sad look isn't helping. I feel claustrophobic. Trapped. Guilty. Neglectful. Even if I just take five seconds to go to the bathroom, she's there, sitting next to the toilet on the floor, watching me and wondering how I could be so cruel to take a few seconds for myself. I feed her, then make my own dinner. By the time I sit down to eat, she's done with her food and sits there staring at me expecting me to give her mine. Then I see that look. That terrorized look when she realizes that I won't be offering her my plate. I know what she's thinking. She'd kill me if she had half a chance. That's why I have to lock her in the closet while I sleep. Keep her away from my throat when I'm unconscious. I see her. That look on her face sometimes. She wants me dead. I just know it.

6 comments:

Annie said...

I remember a discussion in a class once where the teaching said that animals don't communicate. This is a story that would clearly dispute her thesis, don't you think. The way I read it is that little dog is sticking close so YOU won't leave just like her "people" did.

Jeremy said...

Guilt is a good thing to be free of around dogs. But that wouldn't be good for the dog. Remember my neighbors with the chained up dog out front? They've upgraded his accomodations to a small chainlink cage in the back yard where he now howls like a sumbitch.

Yet another reason I don't own a dog whilst living alone in the 'burbs.

Professor Girl said...

It's a lucky thing dogs don't have trigger fingers. Cats, too.

Kieran said...

You can't trust the blighters. Just as soon as you turn your back they'll be on you. Dare we ever forgot the true life account of Old Mother Hubbard?

maarmie said...

Jer Jer: A chainlink cage in the fucking backyard? C'mon! Have some decency and call animal control on those fuckers. They'd never know it was you!

Professor: Yes. It's a good thing. Last night, though, Meeko greedily hogged the futon and left me a narrow sliver upon which to lie. I started to get mad. To wonder why she dared to think the world should so revolve around her. So I started to protest in a language she could understand. No, I didn't beat her. I started whining like she would do. She got a sad and concerned look on her face (or maybe she was scared because she thought I had finally flipped) and actually dropped the chewy treat she was munching on in front of me. She gave me her treat! She DOES love me....In that moment, all my sacrifice was worth it.

Kieran: Old Mother Hubbard? I don't know the "true life account" of her.

maarmie said...

Kieran: What is a "blighter"?