maarmie's musings

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Welcome to the armpit of hell

Today is my last day at work before almost three weeks off for vacation #1 of the year. I am going to Bloomington, Illinois, on Friday to visit a friend who moved there a year ago. Believe me, I wouldn't be going there if I didn't have a reason to. I hear the place is the armpit of hell.

My friend is used to living in places like Dallas and Providence and working in places like NYC, Boston and San Francisco, all with their arty/hipster areas and arty/hipster people where one can feel oh-so-arty-and-hipster if one so chooses and is, further, accepted. Bloomington, however, is filled with, as she says, fat, white, pasty people with dull looks on their faces who do nothing but watch TV and wave their American flags. I'm hoping to get lots of photographs over the next couple of weeks of fat, white, pasty Americans and big, waving flags. Maybe I can capture images of fat, white, pasty people standing in front of or waving American flags. I told my friend I would title the photo exhibition "Americana." Her idea for a title is "Wonder Bread."

I'm looking forward to hanging out with my friend and creating mischief and mayhem in her small town. I haven't thought of any ways to shock and awe Bloomington residents yet, but I'm sure it won't be hard if the place - and its people - are, indeed, anything like she describes.

It won't be all small towns and flat, treeless skylines and uncultured, god-fearing people for us, though. We have tentative plans to go to Chicago, Madison and Minneapolis as well. I'm not sure which of these destinations we'll actually make it to, but we are dreaming big. On second and third thought, I am thinking a midwest extravaganza might not have been the best idea for a relatively lengthy vacation. I'll be glad to be out of Florida, though. And I'm dying to try a slice of Chicago-style pizza.

Who knows? Maybe I'll even run through a corn field. Maybe I'll even enjoy it.

9 comments:

Annie said...

I love this part of the country and hope you will find it refreshing to visit there. The people I know from Illinois and Wisconsin are down-to-earth, level headed, easy to talk with, reliable, able to fix things in a pinch, solid. And though a lot of them may look like Denny Hastert, it's what's inside that counts.

Have a fine time.

maarmie said...

I hope I didn't offend. Maybe I was trying to. Not anyone in particular, just in general. I'm sure I'll have a great time. Otherwise, I wouldn't be going there. Finding a little Americana right now wouldn't be such a bad thing...

Jeremy QA Gibbens said...

You damn well better make it here to Minneapolis! :-)

maarmie said...

I'm not making any promises...

Jeremy QA Gibbens said...

I'm give you a purple nurple if you don't show up!

The Misanthrope said...

Have a wonderful vacation.

maarmie said...

Thank you! I will still be posting during my vacation...so you'll get to see what the armpit of hell looks like almost as soon as I experience it myself! The wonders of technology...

Chris Wilson said...

Be sure to start a rebellion among the young angst ridden teenage crowd, alienated from their religious parents and the constraints put upon them by their small town elders. I suggest you bring your big city dancing to the town square and flaunt your worldly freedoms. Get am all frothy for Babylon.

Oh wait, that was the movie "Footloose". Nevermind.

maarmie said...

By jove, you've given me an idea!